The Kindness Matters Podcast
So. Much. Division. Let's talk about how to change that. Re-engage as neighbors, friends, co-workers and family. Let's set out to change the world. Strike that. Change A World. One person at a time, make someone's life a little better and then do it again tomorrow and the day after that, through kindness.
Kindness is a Super-Power that each of us has within us. It is so powerful it has the potential to change not only your life but those around you, too. Let's talk about kindness.
The Kindness Matters Podcast
Healing Through Generations: Breaking the Cycle of Trauma
What happens when childhood trauma becomes the catalyst for profound healing? Heather Ann Ferri's journey from victim to healer offers a roadmap for anyone struggling with their past.
Growing up in Pittsburgh, Heather endured severe abuse that left her with physical and emotional scars, including brain damage and deep-seated feelings of unworthiness. After years in show business where she "played other people" but couldn't connect with her authentic self, Heather embarked on a healing journey that would transform not only her life but the lives of countless others she now guides.
The conversation takes a fascinating turn as Heather reveals how understanding her family bloodlines—including the discovery of her grandmother's Black American Indian heritage—helped her contextualize generational patterns of trauma. "Maybe I'm the one in this bloodline to reverse it," she reflects, highlighting the power we all have to break cycles that may have persisted for generations.
What sets Heather apart as a healing coach is her commitment to empowerment rather than dependency. "I'm a guide," she explains, emphasizing how she equips clients with personalized toolkits for self-healing. From "downloading" (a form of intuitive channeling) to meditation practices, Heather teaches techniques that allow people to access their own inner wisdom. Her profound insight that "we'll see a kinder society the more people self-care and self-heal" reminds us that personal healing work is not selfish—it's essential for creating a more compassionate world.
Ready to break free from patterns holding you back? Visit HeatherAnnFerri.com to learn how you can begin your own healing journey with someone who truly understands the path from pain to purpose.
This podcast is a proud member of the Mayday Media Network. If you have an idea for a podcast and need some production assistance or have a podcast and are looking for a supportive network to join, check out maydaymedianetwork.com.
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Hello everyone and welcome to the Kindness Matters podcast. I'm your host, mike Rathbun. On this podcast, we promote positivity, empathy and compassion, because we believe that kindness is alive and well, and there are people and organizations that you may not have heard of in the world, making their communities a better place for everyone, and we want you to hear their stories. On this podcast, we talk about matters of kindness because kindness matters. Hey, welcome to the show, everybody. I am so, so happy that you chose to be here with us today. I am so, so happy that you chose to be here with us today, that you actively made a choice to spend 30 minutes of your time here with me and my guest. I'm Mike Rathbun. I'm the host of the Kindness Matters podcast and I am so grateful that you're here.
Speaker 1:I just wanted to throw in one little note. I have started a that you're here. I just wanted to throw in one little note. I have started a newsletter for the podcast. So if you're interested in signing up, it's completely free, but every month you'll get an inspiring, uplifting newsletter in your email. And who among us couldn't use a little inspiring, uplifting message in our email once a month? Right? At least that's the way I'm thinking about it. So go ahead and go to the website it's thekindnessmatterspodcastcom backslash contact. Fill out your information, your name and your email address, and, starting in September, you'll start getting those emails every month. I hope it brings you value. How about that? So I am so excited for my guest today. So excited for my guest today. She is a healing coach and a singer, and a professional nationally known singer, singer Well, maybe singer, but I was going to say speaker, maybe internationally known speaker as well. Heather Ann Ferry is here with us to talk to us and make us feel better. Welcome to the show, heather Ann thank you so much.
Speaker 2:Is it okay if I do a little, a little message for the audience with a singing? Please do yes, of course. It's a beautiful day to love yourself. It's a beautiful day to be kind to yourself. I'm Heather Ann Ferry from the city of Mr Rogers' Neighborhood.
Speaker 1:That is so awesome. I love Mr Rogers, obviously. I mean who doesn't right? I've never met anybody who said I don't like that, mr Rogers, he's just too kind. I've never met anybody that said that right. So you now? You, you were a healer, right, is that? Yes, do I? Have that right and that comes from needing to heal yourself absolutely um, if it would not be too uncomfortable, could you talk to us a little bit about how that came about?
Speaker 2:uh, most definitely, I would say actually the healer in me. I think I, I believe I was born a healer actually oh, wow, wow. But I might've been also born with a curse of generational traumas through my bloodline.
Speaker 1:Oh dear.
Speaker 2:Yeah, so, um, living in Pittsburgh Pennsylvania. My parents were high school sweethearts. They married early and they had a ton of trauma with both bloodlines and through the stress of life. You know the difficulties of my dad losing a job with his family's company and all of that, and this is. You know, this is back in the late sixties, early seventies. We know we didn't have a lot of talk therapy or any types of healing for that for that matter. Um, especially not in Pittsburgh Pennsylvania, for that matter, especially not in Pittsburgh Pennsylvania. But basically, what happened is when I was eight years old, my mother came into my room in the mornings and she would attack me from behind and almost choke me to death while screaming horrific things. And so those screams and those horrific things started to imprint my thinking of I'm not worthy of being here, I'm not good enough, I'm bad, and this unfortunately went on for a period of time and then it stopped. So I ended up having a lot of illnesses growing up after that and brain damage, and it's been a long journey. People can read about that on my website and I have books coming out later this year. But it's been a long journey. People can read about that on my website and I have books coming out later this year. But it's been a really long journey.
Speaker 2:I never heard of the word yoga or shaman or ancient. I grew up blue collar, I grew up really with that, and we did not watch Mr Rogers. We did not watch Mr Rogers, even though my mom was really glued to the TV. I think if we had watched Mr Rogers, maybe there could have been an influence of parenting or how to the way he would talk, because when I walk around the city of Pittsburgh and I mention him every now and then, there is not one man I don't care if it's like blue collar lawyer who their whole aura changes when I say his word, it's just like that.
Speaker 2:You see the little boy like I want to be better, I want to be better, and so, yeah, I was in show business in my twenties and then in my thirties I moved back to Pittsburgh, uh, to really, you know, be with my family and heal, and that healing journey is a long journey, but I started to. I was starting to get lots of pain and sickness and diagnosed and this and that, and then I just decided to walk away from all of that and went on the healer's journey and it's now that I'm finally ending it and really stepping into spiritual counseling and really sharing these ancient sciences that are outside the box, that nobody's heard of. But yeah, that gives you a little taste of my background.
Speaker 1:Yeah, so quick question when you were in entertainment in your 20s and you were away from Pittsburgh, did some of that stuff start to go away? Because, when you were telling that, did some of that stuff start to go away? Because when you were telling that, it almost sounded a bit like it came back like full force once you came back to home. Is that? Did I get that wrong? That's a good question.
Speaker 2:No, I think New York was a very important journey for me in show business. But I had brain damage and was frozen and couldn't feel in show business. But I had brain damage and was frozen and couldn't feel and was in dysfunctional relationships and depressed. And people loved me on stage but people had no idea who I was. Off stage I was playing other people so I wasn't being authentic. I did not have a voice. Now I have and I talk in many of my keynote talks about the tap.
Speaker 2:Masters influenced me greatly in the clubs. They were probably the most spiritual people. Jimmy Slide is a tap legend, divine, masculine. I would connect him to Mr Rogers. But besides that, show business is tricky. Back then when you're a woman and I walked away from contracts, I started to go is this who I am? And so I started to study yoga and meditation in New York, which then led my heart back to Pittsburgh to start to unravel the frozenness and the PTSD that I was in, clueless that I even had to be honest with you because you start to forget your childhood be honest with you, because you start to forget your childhood.
Speaker 1:Yeah, no, it's easy to do right. I'm sure I've forgotten more stuff than I even know. But there was something else I wanted to ask you about. You mentioned the word bloodlines when you were talking about your parents, and that's kind of an important part of what you do, isn't it? Can you talk to us a little bit about more what bloodlines are? Yes, that's a great question.
Speaker 2:I would say that I used that phrase lightly 11 years ago, but I would say, when my father passed away in 2022, and I started to hear him and feel him because we had a lot of things to work out I didn't plan that. Um, I started to understand that I needed an upgrade, new tools, but I also understood that this is generational. You pass it down through childbirth and there's a lot of science to back that. But for me, in the last year, it's the discovering of because, as a little girl, you ask why is my mom like this? Why does she dislike her child? I love her, I'll do anything for her and stuff like that, and that's a turmoil that I've had to work out and work out and I think I've done that with Grace but what I found was her bloodline.
Speaker 2:She never knew her roots and when I say that my maternal grandmother during childbirth, her mother passed away and so her older sister raised her and there was no father in sight and I never looked at my grandmother and noticed that her skin color was a little different than mine, it was a little darker, it was a little darker than my mom's and that there is this possibility as I went through that shamanic and sort of understanding that I now I know who my ancestors on maternal side are are black American Indians. Oh, so if you don't know these roots?
Speaker 2:makes it impossible stems to slavery and trafficking and brutal, brutal violence. And so it doesn't how do I say this? It doesn't apologize or sort of say you know, this is why my mom is the way she is all my life.
Speaker 2:But it sort of makes me understand if this is in our programming and wiring, which I consider myself like sort of like a master at rewiring the brain with PTSD and OCD and childhood trauma and ADHD. But it sort of gave me some relief of like, oh, and maybe I'm the one in this bloodline to reverse it.
Speaker 1:Yeah, absolutely. Wow. That is so, so powerful that you finally found that and figured it out.
Speaker 2:Thank you.
Speaker 1:That's so incredible. So now, it's one thing to heal yourself, right? I mean, we all at some point or another, hopefully work on those things inside us that need attention, but it's completely different to help others heal themselves. How did you make that jump?
Speaker 2:So I was in Pittsburgh, kind of lost, because those programs were coming out and I was back with the family and trying to find my foot of. I just didn't know who I was. You know, and a lot of clients come to me, they have this career, but it into that passion of kindness, you know that stuff. So I, you know I didn't plan on being a healer or being a trauma coach. I kind of slowly fell into it by when I was teaching yoga classes, people would come up and say do you do privates, do you do this, do you do that? So that started the private instructions.
Speaker 2:And then all of a sudden, as I was really going into the brain work and you have to, you know this has been a full-time job because I really was passionate about healing myself. It's a full-time job. So if I'm working eight hours, I'm working eight hours offline healing myself. Eight hours offline healing myself. It is not a quick fix, but what I started. So I started trying like a mad scientist, all kinds of stuff to figure out formulas and how do we figure this out? And slowly I started to get doctors and medical people in front of me and I was like this is strange, but they were teaching me what they were being educated on, and they were also teaching me my innate intuition, which I think a lot of times we lose our intuition, and that's the power of meditation.
Speaker 2:The power of meditation is you start gaining that intuition and you start living your life instead of living it for everybody else.
Speaker 1:Yeah, oh, that's so powerful, and so then I think I lost my train of thought here. It left the station. Take a moment, take a moment I'm going to have to hear, so talk to me about now. You're in touch with other beings. Can you channel people? Yes, you can.
Speaker 2:I channel well, I work with, so, when I came onto this, every podcast I go on I call in the divine mother, who I interpret as the one who created mother earth was called mother for, and then I call in my angelic team. Now, I did not have this ability till after my dad passed away. I want to really note that I, kind of um, was insecure about my intuitions and my psychic abilities and kind of downplayed that a lot, even though I can look back and say, oh wow, that was you know. I give myself credit now, which I didn't before, but, um and so, uh, yeah, I do that, and part of my teaching, though, is not to necessarily be a Chandler for other people, but to teach them how to do it on their own, of course.
Speaker 1:Yeah, that was going to be something else. I, because, I mean, I I think we'd all like to have somebody be a healer for us when we need it, but I think it's so much more impactful when you can do it yourself. But not everybody probably relatively few people actually have that ability to do it themselves and could use some help, and that's where you come in right.
Speaker 2:I love what you just said, because this is my sort of statement in the next couple months is to really send the message out Like I'm a guide. It's very important that people start getting toolkits, and so when people work with me, they have a notebook and they have homework, and if they don't do the homework, that's on them, because you've got to do the meditation for 11 minutes, you've got to do the detox, you've got to take action. That's the only way we're going to empower a population is that we I as a healer teach them what I did in this journey. So I think that's a very important message, because a lot of people like to go to psychics and this and that, but you don't know.
Speaker 2:They could be projecting, they could be from your past life. If you believe in that and this and that, you just don't know. And because I lived such a life of betrayal and abandonment from so many people, I had distrust. I want people to trust whatever and whatever it is, whether it's Buddha, jesus, whatever it is. That's yours and it's important for you. You'll know in your body when it feels right and I think part of me just validates and allows people to step more into their power.
Speaker 1:Yeah, for sure, for sure. And you talk about journaling, but you call it downloading.
Speaker 2:Well, there's two ways of writing.
Speaker 2:I definitely recommend journaling, and it's great to do it in the morning, when you wake up, when you're not overthinking and analyzing, but just sort of setting the tone and and and writing or writing after work if you're stressed out, to get it out of your brain, um, but um, downloading or writing without having any attachment to it is something that is also new to me in the last couple of years, and it's really interesting what comes up, because it's like I didn't, because I used to be OCD over thinker, because when you come from trauma you're trying to protect yourself 24, seven.
Speaker 2:You know you got to control everything, and so that was a journey to detach and to just allow what comes out, and this is what I help people do, not just with healing, but as they're healing. Do you like to sing? Do you like to dance? Do you like to paint? Do you like to write? Do you like to dance? Do you like to paint? Do you like to write? Do you like to? What's that thing that may be missing that can give you some stimulation of of um, enjoyment of happiness?
Speaker 1:Sure, so what is okay? I'm I'm still a little fuzzy. What is downloading? What are you? I mean, you hear the term downloading and I'm thinking okay, are you bringing something in? Is that you have no?
Speaker 2:you're sitting in silence or you're playing an instrument. A lot of musicians when you're, improv is improvisation. When I was a tap dancer, improvisation all of a sudden you're not thinking about the steps they're coming through. So when I became a professional part of my one woman shows, people would be like I heard this and because I'm, I'm letting voices come through me that that audience needs to hear. So I can't control it, I can't manipulate it. I have to be an open channel. That's the key, though.
Speaker 1:Okay.
Speaker 2:An open channel, and I have to be an open channel for good, because you can download evil too.
Speaker 1:Oh really.
Speaker 2:You can get entities and evil and those things too. So when you talk about, when I was thinking about kindness today I was thinking about your show I thought to myself I think we'll see a kinder society the more people self-care more, the more people self-heal more. Because I tell you what, when I was in trauma, ptsd I couldn't think about anyone else and I wasn't in a great mood.
Speaker 1:Right, right, yeah. There's a lot of anger out there in the world, isn't there? Yeah, and yeah if we all worked on ourselves a little bit, maybe we could be kinder. You had a story and I know you've told it when we were offline, but I would really about the counselor in the school district. Can you tell them that again?
Speaker 2:Yeah. So there's this place that I visit sometimes in the evenings I'm going to keep that neutral and there's this woman who works part-time for extra money, but she's a full-time counselor at an elementary school and I've seen her often on. But then there was, you know, I'd say hi in this and then there was one time where we had this deep conversation. I had some time and I was asking her a lot of questions, because I love to ask people questions, as you do, and I love to pick people's brains about what's going on in schools or what's going on in your world, just to see if there's a collective thing, because that's important for me as a healer. And so she started to talk and I I did see, uh, she's been in the, the this career, for 25 years. Um, she is, she looked a bit tired, um, and I could see the old me of overgiving, um, which then can be very taxing to our caregivers.
Speaker 1:Yes.
Speaker 2:And she started to talk and I was asking her questions about the elementary kids. Is it different 10 years ago teaching than now, or being a counselor than now? All those different references, and I'm going to keep those notes aside. But the bottom line is she works the part-time job. That extra money goes to the shoes in the cupboard, the clothes in the cupboard, the things in the essentials. These little children some of them, not all of them, because there's actually rich kids in the school too need and she was sort of talking about how I was asking her questions about I don't want this to sound judgmental, but some of the parents value getting their nails done instead of their shoes being without lots of holes in them. And she is this divine mother which I mentioned to me.
Speaker 2:she's a divine mother and she's going out of her way. And I just kept asking her questions and she says well, the staff doesn't like it. And I said I could relate to that because I've had a lot of judgment from my overgiving or kindness too, in the past. So I said what do you mean? They said you should stop. You're making us look bad. Yeah. And I thought you're helping little children feel like somebody cares about them. Why would that be a problem? Isn't that what a school is for? And so I really spent a lot of time with her and I really felt what a saintly energy to sacrifice because she doesn't have to. She doesn't have to after hours work and invest in this.
Speaker 2:And so what happened is that night I went home and the next morning, when I was writing and meditating, I heard my Mr Rogers and I pulled out of my box I collect angels, um, and I put it. I picked an angel that I felt was her energy and I wrapped it up, put it in gift. I wrote her a little card, just like Mr Rogers always wrote back to his people, and I thought, well, when I see her again, I'm going to give her this. Well, I ran into her the same place a few nights. She's not always there.
Speaker 2:So it was beautiful and I said I want you to have this, but I don't want the staff or boss to know about. I just want you to take this gift and take it home. So she opened it, read it, cried, hugged me. She said I nobody recognizes me. And I said well, I do and I thank you for your service. And she says I'm going to put this angel on my desk. Well, what a beautiful gift for me. So now these little souls, these beautiful souls, see this angel and who knows, maybe that helps stimulate them.
Speaker 1:Yeah, absolutely. That is such a great story and I mean it's sad to me that the school told her to not do that anymore because it makes them look bad.
Speaker 2:Not the school necessarily. Oh, okay the staff, okay the staff, yeah.
Speaker 1:All right, but still, yeah, yeah, it makes us look bad, whatever.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:It's such a great and now you work with anybody right, Anybody that needs help.
Speaker 2:Anybody that feels aligned and called yes.
Speaker 1:Okay, and the website is heatherannferrycom.
Speaker 2:Yes, my name Yep. Look at that how easy is that to remember.
Speaker 1:But in case you don't remember it, we will have a link to Heather's website in the show notes so you can, if you need Heather's help I mean, we all need help right At some point or another. All of us need somebody and if you feel like Heather aligns with you and you could, you know, gain something useful from speaking with her, she's as close as the show notes and a click away. You so much for coming on the show today. I really, really appreciate it and I appreciate what you do and your message and thank you.
Speaker 2:Thank you so much for allowing me to speak today and share my message. I really appreciate that. Many blessings to you and to the audience that's listening.
Speaker 1:Awesome, awesome. We will be in touch soon. Take care. I want to thank you for taking this time to listen to this episode with my guest, heather Ann Ferry. I hope that you were able to take something positive from the time you spent with us today. Maybe you'll be inspired, maybe you'll be motivated, maybe you'll be moved. If you experienced any of those positive feelings, please consider sharing this podcast with your friends and family. I'm always striving to offer you a better podcast. So, you know, give me some feedback, drop me an email, mike at the kindness matters podcastcom, or leave us a message on our socials. And speaking of our socials, you will find us all over the interwebs. We are on facebook, we are on instagram, we are on tiktok, we're on youtube, we're on linkedin just look for us, you'll find us. Please feel free to subscribe or follow us. And also, speaking of subscribing, we have a new newsletter out and if you go to well, there'll be a link in the show notes. But if you go to the kindnessmatterspodcastcom and backslash contact, you can sign up. It's completely free and you'll receive a positive, uplifting email in your inbox every single month. So there's something to do as well.
Speaker 1:This podcast is part of the Mayday Media Network. If you have an idea for a podcast, need some production assistance or you already have a podcast and you're looking for a supportive network to join, check out maydaymedianetworkcom and check out the many different shows they have Afrocentric Spoil, my Movie Generation Mixtape In a Pickle Radio Show, wake Up and Dream with D'Anthony Palin, staxo, pax and the amazing Time Pals. We'll be back again next week with a brand new episode and we would be honored if you would join us. You've been listening to the Kindness Matters Podcast. I'm your host, mike Rathbun. Have a fantastic week.
