The Kindness Matters Podcast
So. Much. Division. Let's talk about how to change that. Re-engage as neighbors, friends, co-workers and family. Let's set out to change the world. Strike that. Change A World. One person at a time, make someone's life a little better and then do it again tomorrow and the day after that, through kindness.
Kindness is a Super-Power that each of us has within us. It is so powerful it has the potential to change not only your life but those around you, too. Let's talk about kindness.
The Kindness Matters Podcast
The Kindness Revolution: Raising Children Who Change Lives
When parents see headlines about rising juvenile crime rates, it's easy to feel helpless. While juvenile arrests have declined since the 1990s, troubling increases in firearm violence and homicide rates among youth ages 10-14 have parents searching for answers. Teresa Ramirez, motivational speaker and kindness ambassador, offers a compelling alternative to fear—intentional kindness that transforms families from the inside out.
"Parents need to become the CEO of their families," Teresa explains, sharing practical techniques that help children develop the empathy and social awareness that troubled youth often lack. Her approach isn't complicated—it begins with three simple daily check-in questions, gratitude practices, and powerful words of affirmation that create a foundation of kindness within the home.
What makes Teresa's message unique is her focus on intentionality. "People say, 'I'm kind all the time,' but with intentionality comes consistency," she explains. Her stories illustrate how this approach works in real-world situations—from defusing road rage with a clown nose to transforming a hostile server's day with a simple note. These moments demonstrate the ripple effect of kindness that extends far beyond individual interactions.
Parents will appreciate Teresa's practical tools—using bubbles to teach children how to pause before reacting, writing sticky notes with encouraging messages, and acknowledging the "invisible people" in our communities. These simple acts build a foundation that helps children navigate social challenges and notice peers who might be struggling or isolated.
The episode culminates with Teresa sharing resources from her award-winning book "Raising Kind Children" and her free guide "75 Acts of Kindness"—a graduated list that helps families start their journey toward making kindness "as natural as breathing." Download this powerful resource and discover how your family can be part of the solution to creating a more compassionate world, one intentional act at a time.
This podcast is a proud member of the Mayday Media Network. If you have an idea for a podcast and need some production assistance or have a podcast and are looking for a supportive network to join, check out maydaymedianetwork.com.
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Well, hello there and welcome. You are listening to the Kindness Matters podcast and I am your host, mike Rathbun. What is this podcast all about? It's about kindness. It's a pushback against everything negative that we see in the news and on social media today, and it's a way to highlight people, organizations that are simply striving to make their little corner of the world a little better place. If you want to join in on the conversation, feel free, Go ahead and follow us on all of your social media feeds. We're on Facebook, instagram, tiktok. We're even on LinkedIn under Mike Rathbun. Check us out. We're even on LinkedIn under Mike Rathbun. Check us out and, in the meantime, so sit back, relax, enjoy and we'll get into the Kindness Matters podcast.
Speaker 1:Hello and welcome everybody to the show. Thank you so much for taking the time. You chose to take 30 minutes or so out of your day to listen to this podcast, and I just want you to know that I appreciate it so much. Thank you, thank you, thank you, and if you find anything of use in this show, if you find something relative or relatable in this show, don't be shy, go ahead and share this show with all of your friends, your family and co-workers. What have you Let them know that you found a show that you found relatable or that made you feel good Because that's what we're here to do, right. That made you feel good, because that's what we're here to do, right.
Speaker 1:So today we're going to talk about something that will make every parent cringe just a little bit, and that is juvenile crime rates. First, the good news Arrests of juveniles have significantly decreased since the early 1990s, with a notable drop in property crime arrests. Great news. Right Now for the bad news, because you can't have good news. We're all about balance here, right? Some areas of juvenile crime are trending up instead of down. For example, there's a noticeable increase in offending among younger juveniles, age 10 to 14, compared to juveniles ages 15 to 17. In particular, there's a rise in firearm involvement in crimes, and juvenile homicide is up a whopping 65% from 2016 to 2022. But before you lose hope and you go, I don't need to listen to that negativity. Stop, because I have.
Speaker 1:My guest today is Teresa Ramirez, and she is a motivation speaker, a best-selling author, an award-winning author and a kindness ambassador for loving parents who want to raise kids, raise kind children. How about that? Today's parents can see how some troubled teens are turning to devastating acts of violence because they see no other way. Consequently, parents want to make sure they are doing everything in their power to raise happy, healthy, kind children and their power to raise happy, healthy, kind children. And Teresa Ramirez can help you, as a parent, to do that through her divinely inspired video messages, blog posts and fun with bubbles. I'm going to have to ask about that one Style. She's here to encourage parents to be the CEO of their families, culting an atmosphere of fun, happy moments with their children through acts of kindness. Welcome to the show, teresa.
Speaker 2:Well, thank you so much for having me. I'm so happy to be here, you know what?
Speaker 1:And parents these days, they need the hope that you can give them right, because every parent is out there going oh my God, what if? And that might be just you know what's the word Second nature to parenting right, you know the parent. I will never forget the one time my wife and I got up and one of our kids was gone. He just left, he snuck out overnight. I mean luckily there was nothing really bad about it, he just snuck out. We had no idea where he was.
Speaker 1:And you know what were our options at that point. We called all his friends, none of them. Well, they all said they didn't know where he was. Maybe they did, maybe they didn't, but said they didn't know where he was. Maybe they did, maybe they didn't. But in those days I could, we had the ability to turn off his phone service because he was on our account. You have never seen somebody get in touch with you so fast as a kid whose phone service has just turned off. But yeah, I mean, it's a scary time to be a parent, but you're here to help.
Speaker 2:I am here to help. I am here to help and it is a scary time, but I think you know we're kind of getting into the back to school time. We're getting close to that, because people go back now August 1st oh really, because people go back now August 1st?
Speaker 2:Oh really, yeah, some Kentucky schools do, but we just have to be intentional. It just comes down to oh, but I do that, I'm nice, I'm kind, but you need to start putting it into practice, being intentional about it. I encourage parents become the CEO of your families and you determine the values and philosophies you want to instill in your kids and you want them walking out the door on a high note. You know, feeling good about themselves, and then they're going to treat others the same.
Speaker 1:Yeah, they will. How did we get here? How did you end up working in this space?
Speaker 2:I. There was a school shooting in 2018 in Parkland, florida. Now, no, I did not know anybody in it, but I do believe God said no, we can do better, you got to do something. So I just kind of grieved and sympathized and I know that particular one. They were really fighting to change laws, they wanted to change policies in the schools, but that all takes a lot of time and the kids don't have control over that. So I said let's empower the kids. Let's tell them to go sit with that kid that's sitting alone eating lunch at the lunch table. Or okay, somebody's just dumped their backpack all over the floor. Okay, let's not laugh. Let's help them pick up the stuff. You know those simple things. So how you know, and remind them how do you want to be treated. If something happens, how do you want to be treated? And that is empowering the kids to be kind to each other, which makes a huge improvement in the environment in their schools.
Speaker 1:Absolutely it does. I don't want to say most, but I don't have the actual stats. But it seems to me that a lot of these school shooters were outsiders. Right, they were bullied picked on as I understand it.
Speaker 2:Yes, yes, and you also have to look into the suicide rate, which is also devastating, but it goes hand in hand. Sadly, the two go together. So how are you treating and I know this is not a popular opinion, but what's going on with that bully's life? And people don't look at the bully, they're just thinking he's this awful kid. Well, he didn't get to be the awful kid all by himself.
Speaker 1:He wasn't born that way.
Speaker 2:He wasn't born that way. So what happened and how are you treating him? And you can flip that and I have some ideas on how to work on flipping that. And then you know the same thing with the suicide rate that kid was so low, why and this is where you know your parents one of my techniques I do with parents is are you checking in with your kids every day? Are you asking them three questions what's the best thing that happened to you today? What's the thing that you're not so crazy about, that happened today and what made you laugh? Those are three check, easy peasy check-in questions. You can ask while you're driving them to their 101 extracurricular activities whether you're sitting across to the dinner table. You know when there's a quiet time just before bedtime. Those are great time to answer and there are three easy questions and that helps you, as a parent, check in with your child.
Speaker 1:And I, you know, I think I was guilty of that a little bit, or not that not doing that or not that not doing that. And because every kid goes through that point right where they don't want to talk about their day, they'll get pushback, you know, like oh mom, these are dumb. Or oh, dad, I don't want to. You know, I don't want to talk about it, I just want to. I mean, is there an answer to that?
Speaker 2:Well, yeah, because I did have one parent said after about a week of it, the kids are like, do we have to do this every night? And you know so. Then okay, so break it up. Don't do it at the dinner table, do it while you're driving in the car, you know. Or if you're, you know you're blessed to be able to take a walk or do a fun activity, whatever that may be, as a family. Do it then. So just kind of shake it up, okay.
Speaker 1:I always say it's your work.
Speaker 2:Yeah, don't make it so much of a routine. Yeah, yeah, Okay all right.
Speaker 2:Yeah, and also another technique. So I know we're probably getting ahead of myself. But gratitude, make sure and I say at night time, sit down and you have your own list as a parent, you have your list, sit down, the two of you together. You have your children, you have you. You both make gratitude lists so that they're seeing that there's some good things that happened that you can be grateful for. And if it comes down to I've got a roof over my head, food on the table, we get back down to basics, then that's what you do, but then you can build from it, because then, once you get in practice, you'll start seeing oh yeah, that was a good thing that happened. Oh yeah, yeah, I did get an A on that math test.
Speaker 1:Yeah for sure, and you know if you're making it alongside them and they maybe feel stuck a little bit um, I know sometimes it can. It can be hard sometimes to make up a list every single day. I had a friend who said she never used a journal at all and then she said she forced herself. She said one day I just woke up I said write down three things that I'm grateful for today. And she did it that day and she did it the next day and then she said it was like it improved my mood and my mental health so much because I was writing, filling out pages of journals every morning, of things that I was grateful for. And it really does come that easy once you start doing it intentionally, right.
Speaker 2:Absolutely, absolutely.
Speaker 1:Awesome. So I was going to ask you how early can we start this? I don't want to say it's not training, but this program for kids, I mean toddlers don't when they're babies?
Speaker 2:Um, yeah, because I'm actually talking to a group in September. So, yeah, you can start when they're babies. Because what are you saying to them? Your words? People do not always realize. Your words have a lot of power. So what are you saying? You're, you're baby, you're you're, you're smart, you're important, you are the best thing that's ever happened to me, you light up my life, all those things. And as the kids get older, you can start putting the sticky notes on the mirror or on their bedroom doors. Or, you know, my favorite is they've been studying for the dreaded math test all week. Stick the note in the backpack, you've got this, you know. So words, I love that. So words, used as a parent. It starts with words and then it goes into the actions. But words are where you want to start, and that can start the day they're born.
Speaker 1:Yeah, absolutely, and I think the earlier you start, the bigger impact. You have right, absolutely.
Speaker 2:Because by the time they get into grade school, by the time they're six, you've really formed their character foundation, so to speak.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and they're more likely to see that kid sitting by himself, Whereas if they did not have that positive interaction prior to going to school, they might not notice him or could be hurt. Yeah, it's. I've often said you know how much just kind words can change somebody's world, and if we can teach our kids to just be that person. Almost all of my social media posts I posted with the podcast, I always throw in the hashtag be the change, Because we all should be striving to be the change that we want to see in the world. And that goes for kids too, right, If they want to see a better world for themselves to go up in, and maybe it's not a big thing, but they can make a difference in somebody else's life just by listening or having lunch with them.
Speaker 2:I have a perfect example of in my early kindness journey and I didn't really realize what impact I was going to have. But I had gone to lunch with a friend and the server comes up to the table what do you want? And we're like um, we've got a couple of questions about the menu. I don't know. I was told to come over and take your order. What do you want? And we're like yeah, and it was that bad, it was probably a little worse. We're like we placed our order, we got our food, everything was fine.
Speaker 2:But I don't think she ever came over and refilled a coffee or water or anything and at the end of the meal she slams the bill down and that was it. And we're like okay, so this is where intentional kindness comes in. I didn't know it at the time. I've got a name for it now my friend and I are sitting there. We had every right to call over that manager and complain. I mean, she was mad and you know I'm just like let's try something else. So we went ahead and paid her, left her a normal tip. We didn't delete that or anything. We left her the tip and on the receipt I put a smiley face and wrote you were designed to shine, Just gathered up our stuff, walked on out the door. Well, lo and behold, she chased us out into the parking lot.
Speaker 2:Oh thank you. She had tears, thank you. I really needed to hear that today. Love that. We got on our heels and went back in and my friend and I get in the car and we're like who knew? Just, you know, my just a simple thing written on a receipt and it turned her day around and we always think we probably saved a few customers, future customers, from having the same experience we did. Yeah, that's it. But that's where the intentionality comes in and you know you're and as you're, making kindness a foundation and it's natural, breathing. Those kind of things come easier. It's going to flow more naturally.
Speaker 1:Because you had a choice in that moment.
Speaker 2:We had a huge yes.
Speaker 1:And you could have you would have been perfectly justified to go with either.
Speaker 2:Yeah, no one would have faulted us for complaining, but we chose another route. No, I had at the time had no idea what was going to happen. If it made any difference, then I was pleasantly surprised that we did make a difference, and we made a big difference.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I love that. Is there a way to develop that intentional way of thinking, because I kind of see you as an expert here in this.
Speaker 2:Yes, and it is. And I post on my stuff all these acts of kindness that come in because you have to, and people say, well, I'm kind all the time. I said you've got to be intentional, because with intentionality comes consistency, comes building that foundation and making it as natural as breathing. And that's what we want. We want it to just kind of flow and, and that's just. You know I say starting the kids off with the kind words, going out the door, your significant other, the note on their coffee mug, you lighten, you brighten my life, or you know I love you.
Speaker 2:Whatever the case may be, whatever you want to put it, you know it's personal, it's between you two, but you're lifting each other up in your own home, under your own roof, before you even step out the door, and that's where it starts. And then you can go and be kind to coworkers, bus drivers, carpool drivers, the principal, and I always say don't forget the invisible people, and that's your cafeteria workers, your custodians. We would be lost without them, but we never, don't always, speak to them. I mean just a smile and hello would brighten their day. But you just have to get up in the morning and say, okay, this is where I'm going and keep and where can I look for opportunities to be kind and it can be.
Speaker 2:And the sticky notes with your home life. That's wonderful. What you say to each other at home, that's where you want to start. But the simplest act of kindness you can do once you're out the door is just smile and say hello. And I'll tell you an example I have of that. How impactful it is is a friend of mine worked in a parking garage and smile good morning, whatever. Every time. Every morning his regulars would come in and then he went on vacation for two weeks. They came back and his regulars are like where have you been? I have had the worst two weeks of my life.
Speaker 2:Your good morning and your smile Starts my day off right and I always feel good going off to the office and he came back to me one day. It was so cute. He said you kindness, lady. He said you always told me there was an impact and he said I never understood what you meant until it's someone showed it to me. And that's doesn't cost anything and and it's so simple. So start there. You know that's the challenge for everybody. Listening is start by saying hello and smile at everybody you encounter and that gets things started and gets in your brain and before you know it, you're going to be making it as natural as breathing. Yeah.
Speaker 1:And that's the payoff.
Speaker 2:I'm sorry.
Speaker 1:Go ahead, you're done.
Speaker 2:Then we can go into the payoff, which is like the restaurant example. Or I can do the road rage example. It doesn't work over well, it doesn't translate well on audio, but road rage example. Um doesn't work over well, it doesn't translate well on audio, but road rage. There's no room in your journey and kindness for road rage.
Speaker 2:And the person sitting next to you is next year's future driver so they're watching everything you say, all your hand signals, so you want to be aware of that. I did have a situation where I don't know what I did. To this day. I have no idea what I did. But I'm pulling off on the exit ramp, there's a red light, the guy in front of me stops, gets out of his car and he's running at me yelling and he's coming for my car and I'm like my goodness, and so I look and I happen to have this in the car Don't ask why and I put on a red cleft lip and then I'm just waiting through the windshield going please stop, he couldn't stop that, oh my God.
Speaker 2:And I still, to this day, wonder what he told people when he got where he was going about the crazy lady with the crown on, so he just stopped and turned around.
Speaker 2:He stopped and was so, he was proud. You know, here I am thinking, please don't pull a gun out. And he's probably thinking, oh, she's loony tunes, never mind to for mine. Um, but yeah, the use of humor in those situations again, this is if you're making it up, you already have the foundation, so you've had to be intentional. It made it easier for me to say, yeah, this might work, and it did.
Speaker 1:um, yeah, and for whatever reason, you had a clown nose in your car I, I.
Speaker 2:It's a long story, okay, but who knows that? I now use it, and now there's one in my car on, intentionally, um, just in case I might need it for a situation you just never know.
Speaker 1:No, I was going to say, talk to me about fun with bubbles.
Speaker 2:Fun with bubbles. That is also part of your foundation, because, also, once you've built your foundation, we had to stop and think about the waitress, about the server. I had to stop and think on my feet with the clown nose, but that's your pause. So, whatever you know, you're in a confrontational situation. You have got, instead of reacting back in a, in a not nice manner.
Speaker 1:Right.
Speaker 2:You take a step back and take a deep breath and blow it out. Then, okay, how do I do I use different words? Can I use a one-liner? Do you want you know? What can I do to turn this? Flip this around, and what I encourage parents to do is to get the blowing bubbles out and practice with your kids, and you have to take a deep breath and blow it out, and this is how you get your kids to practice taking a pause and it's fun, so they're going to remember it and the more you do it, the more they're going to be able to take that pause themselves when they're in those awkward, sticky situations.
Speaker 1:Love that. Okay, can you talk to us about your books? Let's talk about your books.
Speaker 2:I have a kindness journal. So if you ever want to, this is also helpful to making it as natural as breathing is. I have a kindness journal where you can log every day your acts of kindness that day and you can also put your gratitude in there as well. But that's how reinforces making it as natural as breathing. And then I have my book raising kind children and it's it's an award-winning book and, yes, I'm going to brag because I'm really proud of it.
Speaker 2:Do it you should be but this is the process and it's quick breed. It's short and sweet, intentionally for parents, but it's the process. It's how do you build the foundation, making it as a natural, as breathing. It's how can you bring in the community, the soccer team, women's ministries, the children's ministries, whatever group you're at the chess club, bringing them together to say, hey, let's do a food drive for the food bank, let's gather, let's collect new socks for the homeless shelter. And then from there it goes into by using the three techniques to be kind in those awkward, sticky situations, because it's just the progression, progression, and the more you build, the better your foundation is, the easier you're going to be to respond kindly in those um awkward situations, sure, and I think I'm running short here a little bit um, you volunteer, you do some volunteer work too, right?
Speaker 2:I do volunteer work at now at a variety of places. I used to do one and um I I've moved and shifted, so I I now am doing, you know, I'll do a soup kitchen. I'll help with the church. Do pass out sandwiches to the homeless um I donate a lot like. I clean my closet out regularly and donate to the local charities. Helps us both out. So yeah, there's a lot.
Speaker 1:Okay, fantastic. So the website is.
Speaker 2:Journeyinkindnesscom.
Speaker 1:All one word, all one word. Well, with the exception of thecom, all one word All one word. Well, with the exception of thecom, we will have that link in the in the show notes, and we'll also know. I have one thing you can get the book there too.
Speaker 2:The book is on Amazon and you'll post the links, but I did want to also offer your listeners 75 Acts of Kindness. It's a freebie to download and it's a graduation of you know, starting with a smile and hello to planting trees to be kind to the planet and you as a family. If you don't know where to start on your journey in kindness, then this is a great list and you can sit down and decide as a family what are we going to do this week? What are we going to do today? That's fantastic and, like I said, it graduates to planting trees to be kind of clean.
Speaker 1:That is so fantastic. Do they have to do anything to get that?
Speaker 2:Yeah, there is the link that we will provide, perfect.
Speaker 1:Perfect, perfect. Teresa, thank you so much for taking the time to come on and talk about this, because my kids are grown my youngest has turned 30 last December, so I mean and he's probably not having kids. But anyway, I know as a parent, you know these are the things that we worry about, and people like you who can lead us, who can show us a way to make a positive difference, because when we make a positive difference in our own kids' lives, they go out and make a positive difference in somebody else's life. It's that whole ripple effect thing, right.
Speaker 2:It is, it is, and there's scientific proof to back that up as well.
Speaker 1:Nice, yes, so thank you, thank you. Thank you so much for being who you are and being on my show. I really appreciate it.
Speaker 2:Well, thank you so much for having me. It's been so much fun.
Speaker 1:Perfect, we will talk again soon. Your episode will be out on Thursday, the 24th. Wait, yes, no, yes, the 24th, I'm sorry, a week from tomorrow. How about that? Take care, and we will talk again soon. I want to thank you so much for taking this time today to listen to this episode with my guest, teresa Ramirez. I hope you're able to take something positive from the time you spent with us today. Maybe you'll be inspired, maybe you'll have better conversations with your kids, maybe you'll be motivated. Whatever that feeling is, if you experienced it, please consider sharing this podcast with your friends and family. I'm always striving to offer you a better podcast, so you know, give me some feedback. Let me know how you think I'm doing.
Speaker 2:Email me.
Speaker 1:Leave a message On any of my socials, anywhere you can find. It would mean the world. Also feel free to follow us on our social media pages like Facebook, instagram, linkedin and TikTok. This podcast is part of the Mayday Media Network. If you have an idea for a podcast and need some production assistance, or have a podcast already and you're looking for a supportive network to join, have a podcast already and you're looking for a supportive network to join, check out MaydayMediaNetworkcom and check out the many different shows like Afrocentric Spoil, my Movie Generation Mixtape In a Pickle Radio Show, wake Up and Dream with D'Anthony Palin, staxo Pax and the Time Pals with D'Anthony Palin, stax Opaques and the Time Pals. We will be back again next week with a brand new episode and we would be honored if you would join us. You've been listening to the Kindness Matters Podcast. I'm your host, mike Rathbun. Have a fantastic week.
