The Kindness Matters Podcast
So. Much. Division. Let's talk about how to change that. Re-engage as neighbors, friends, co-workers and family. Let's set out to change the world. Strike that. Change A World. One person at a time, make someone's life a little better and then do it again tomorrow and the day after that, through kindness.
Kindness is a Super-Power that each of us has within us. It is so powerful it has the potential to change not only your life but those around you, too. Let's talk about kindness.
The Kindness Matters Podcast
The Ripple Effect of Simple Acts of Kindness: An Interview with Terri Hamilton
Have you ever wondered how a simple act of kindness could ripple through a community and change lives? Today, we sit down with Terri Hamilton, a positive mindset and mindfulness coach, who shares her incredible journey from being an elementary school teacher and guidance counselor to founding Apparent Connection LLC. Terry's passion for promoting kindness, compassion, and effective communication among students shines through as she discusses the challenges children face in this digital age and the vital role adults must play in creating a supportive environment.
The conversation takes a heartwarming turn as we explore various kindness initiatives that are making a real impact. From a woman in Florida whose "Be Kind" signs have traveled the globe to Terri's own "I Believe in Kindness" page, we spotlight numerous efforts to spread joy. Their monthly gatherings, including rock painting events, are designed to cultivate kindness and create positive ripple effects throughout the community. You’ll be inspired by the power of these small acts and how they can transform lives.
We also delve into the simple but profound impact of sending appreciation cards. A touching story of a woman reconnecting with an old friend through a heartfelt note serves as a reminder that kindness doesn't need to be reserved for special occasions. As we prepare for a brief summer break, replaying some of our most cherished episodes, we encourage you to spread kindness daily. Whether it’s complimenting a stranger, supporting a loved one, or just showing up with a positive attitude, you have the power to make the world a better place. Tune in and join us in making kindness a priority!
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Speaker 2:Kindness, we see it all around us. We see it when someone pays for someone else's coffee or holds the door open for another person. We see it in the smallest of gestures, like a smile or a kind word. But it's different when we turn on the news or social media. Oftentimes what we hear about what outlets are pushing is the opposite of kind. Welcome to the Kindness Matters Podcast. Our goal is to give you a place to relax, to revel in stories of people who have received or given kindness, a place to inspire and motivate each and every one of us to practice kindness every day. Hey, you Welcome to the Kindness Matters Podcast, and you too, and also you and over there. You Welcome to the Kindness Matters Podcast. I am your host, mike Rathbun. As you, welcome to the kindness matters podcast. I am your host, mike rathbun.
Speaker 2:As you heard during the intro, this podcast belongs to the deluxe edition network. I do not. I wish I had this voice, but I can't do it. But as such, the deluxe edition network has a podcast of the month, and for the month of July, the podcast is drumroll, please, the Real Drunks. That's R-E-E-L.
Speaker 2:Real Drunks is a movie companion podcast. You'll want to join Matt, jake and their guests as they watch and discuss their favorite movies, along with other random off-the-wall topics. Make sure you enjoy, because things usually go off the rails. Also, make sure to check out the show notes, where you will find links and discount codes for two companies I've partnered with Sunday Scaries, a company that makes broad-spectrum CBD gummies and Coffee Bros. They have an amazing blend of coffees and coffee-related products. I use both of those and they are nothing short of amazing. With that said, let's get into the show. Hey, everybody, welcome to the show. As always, I have a fabulous guest for you today. Always, I have a fabulous guest for you. Today, my guest is a positive mindset and mindfulness coach and the founder of Apparent Connection LLC. Welcome to the show, terry Hamilton. Welcome, terry.
Speaker 1:Thank you so much, Mike. It's great to be here with you.
Speaker 2:I am so lucky to have you, because you we're going to talk about this maybe not right this second, but you were really involved in kindness and you're very active in a number of things, but you didn't start off that way. You started off as a guidance counselor, right?
Speaker 1:I did, I did, I did. I originally started as an elementary school teacher and I did that for a little bit of time and then I had two beautiful baby boys who I spent time with and then went back to school to get my master's in counseling and decided to become a guidance counselor, which I absolutely loved.
Speaker 2:Now see, I don't remember and I mean, granted, this is a long time ago, but I don't remember guidance counselors in elementary school. Is that just a middle school, high school position?
Speaker 1:Actually, this school that I taught at was an elementary school. It was kindergarten through sixth grade. The children nowadays actually do need guidance counselors, and the part that I loved most about it was I got to go into classrooms and teach them about kindness and compassion and making friends, which was amazing.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah, oh, for sure, because and you see their little minds just open up and that's so awesome. Um, so you did that for quite a while, for a while.
Speaker 1:I did that for three years.
Speaker 2:And then what made you decide to like split off and start your own company?
Speaker 1:Well, the real reason was I never had enough time with the children, the parents, the teachers. The school day is a bit restrictive and I always felt like I was in a conversation and I didn't have enough time to complete it. So I decided that if I opened up my own business, that I would have as much time as I needed to spend with the children, the teachers and the parents. Hence the word apparent connection was that getting those parents and teachers and children together really makes a difference to have the whole circle of adults helping children succeed.
Speaker 2:For sure. And now you've been doing that for 10 years. Is that right?
Speaker 1:2012,. I started my apparent connection, okay, so it's like 12 years.
Speaker 2:Yeah, Wow, have you seen a change in students? Change in students? Just I mean, it seems like kids today and it was true for my kids who are grown now and out of the house and everything, but it seems even more so just they're stressed about everything these days.
Speaker 1:They absolutely are, Mike, and I think it's a combination of different events, but one of the things that has really affected especially our preteens and teens is social media. It has put a tremendous amount of stress on them. They see what they expect and the talking back and forth. They're losing those communication skills that you and I had face to face. Now it's being done through texting and social media platforms and it does create a lot of stress for them.
Speaker 2:I think just yesterday didn't the Surgeon General come out and say that social media should have a warning label on it, like cigarettes?
Speaker 1:Absolutely. I did see that on the news also. It is really really true. When you and I were growing up, if we had an argument with a friend, the next day we made up and it was over. But now, if someone has a disagreement with a friend, thousands of people know about it, which creates this isolation for the children that I work with, and mostly the teens. You really see that.
Speaker 2:For sure the teens, yeah. And again, like when you and I were going to school, at the end of the school day, you got home, that was it for school, right, unless you hung out with one of your friends from school. You had time to decompress and to relax and forget about whatever happened during the day and you went back to school the next day and things were. You know there were probably still people you didn't like there, but you know it was. Whatever happened the day before was gone and and now it's like they just get home and they're reliving it over and over and over again. 24, seven.
Speaker 1:It does happen. And the other thing that is true for a lot of the students today is they don't get outside. You and I, I'm guessing, have spent a lot of time outside after school, and so nature nurtures, and that piece of childhood is gone for a lot of students in general. So the more that they can get outside, the better it is. I say nature nurtures, and even if you can only get out there for 10 minutes, it matters.
Speaker 2:Yeah, my second oldest. He was huge. I mean, sometimes a backpack didn't even make it inside the house before he was off, so they were still outside, but um, but yeah, and there was maybe Facebook. I think Snapchat was around. There was no TikTok when my kids were growing up.
Speaker 1:Yeah, there's just so many of them, there's just so many platforms, and so there's hours and hours and hours of scrolling that happens, which we know is not good for any of our brains, especially developing brains and our brains are not fully developed until we're 25 years old and so there's a lot of growth that happens.
Speaker 2:And in my case it's still occurring.
Speaker 1:We can keep learning, mike, we can still occurring, we can keep learning.
Speaker 2:Mike, we can, uh, yeah, it's just. I know I never wanted to be on TikTok and, um, we were visiting with a client one day I think it was during the pandemic, it was 2020 or 2021 and and she had asked if we were on TikTok and I said, oh, I can't handle another social media platform to be on right now. I was on LinkedIn and Twitter and Facebook and I'm like I can't do another one. She's like I don't post to it, I just watch it because it's funny and it makes me laugh and it brightens my day. I'm like, oh, okay, now I have an account.
Speaker 1:I haven't given in to TikTok. I'm on Facebook and I'm on Instagram and I'm on LinkedIn, but I haven't given in to TikTok yet.
Speaker 2:And I will say that, if you're just looking for something to make you laugh although there's a lot more political content on there now than I think there used to be but it is cute dogs, cute cats, you know you can. And if you want, because of the algorithm, right, if that's all you watch, they'll just keep showing you those things, and I can live like that. Really honestly, show me another cute puppy, dang it. I'll be here for hours.
Speaker 1:Happiness is good for us.
Speaker 2:It is, it is, and so now, when somebody comes to you, is it specifically teens that come to you, or their parents?
Speaker 1:a teen? Is it specifically teens that come to you or their parents? Yeah, now I am typically working with high school juniors and seniors, the ones who are looking to go to college and are putting a lot of stress on themselves because they want to be captains of their teams, they want to volunteer, they want to get great grades, they want the best SAT scores. And then the transitioning over to college, where they have that new experience of living on their own and the stress of a roommate they may or may not like and, once again, making new friends and getting good grades. And their parents, because the parents are also stressed. It's usually the moms that reach out, but I do have a few dads that come for coaching, so I just like to really help with really practical strategies on how to calm your mind and feel better and less stress.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I've got a sister-in-law and her oldest will be going to Iowa for college next year or in the fall I guess, and she's pretty stressed out and you know it's not. I always said if they could go in-state that would be better, because at least then you know you can go for a weekend and see them or they can come home or what have you. Even Iowa is not too bad because I live in Minnesota. So you know interstate 35, straight shot. But especially like the folks whose kids are going thousands of miles away to college, yeah, it is a big adjustment and I had such a wonderful college experience.
Speaker 1:I want that for everyone, and so I really love to help those kids build their self-confidence and know that they are doing a great job and they have lots to offer the world. And it's okay to ask for help, and I love being that coach that's cheering them on and giving them strategies, because we need strategies right.
Speaker 2:Yeah, absolutely. Every one of us needs some kind of strategy in our life At one point or another, oftentimes multiple times in our life, we need strategies and that's so great that you're doing that. But you're not just involved in the coaching aspect, right, you are heavily involved in what are we going to call it the kindness movement, the kindness revolution yeah, it's a journey, it's a kindness journey, it's a kindness mission.
Speaker 1:Whatever we want to call it, it is all about kindness. I came to the conclusion, um near the beginning of the year, that I really wanted to be remembered for being kind, and so I'm like let's be kindness ambassadors. I want to gather up people and let's be kindness ambassadors. And I have been.
Speaker 2:Is there a sash involved?
Speaker 1:Yeah, we could make a sash. I have been like overjoyed and overwhelmed by the people who are saying, yes, I want to be part of that, yes, I want more of that. You know, sometimes, with mindfulness and mindset, I have to explain that to people and what I do. But kindness, everybody understands, everybody knows what that is Right and it's so good for the giver and the receiver and all the endorphins that happen when we do small acts of kindness. And I love random acts of kindness, but I especially love intentional acts of kindness, like what do you do intentionally without expecting anything in return? How can you help another human being? And I started a Facebook group called I Believe in Kindness and in less than three months I have 177 kindness ambassadors and I am thrilled that everyone is stepping up and saying yes, please, I want to be a part of that.
Speaker 2:Now, what does that involve?
Speaker 1:To be a kindness ambassador.
Speaker 1:Yeah, to be a kindness ambassador. You just want to help another human being. That's what it means to be a kindness ambassador. Yeah right, it's not hard at all and it's so fulfilling. So if you want some inspiration, you want to share some inspiration, I'd love to have you join me and I know that you joined me, mike in that mission. I Believe in Kindness. Yes, believe in kindness. If you're local to New Hampshire, I have kindness gatherings once a month. Just had one last Friday and we just had so much fun talking about what kindness means to us, how we would like to share it in the community and how we can spread it out. And I can now say we're international because I have a kindness ambassador from Canada.
Speaker 2:What Yay? How about that?
Speaker 1:That's fabulous.
Speaker 2:I'm thrilled. That's so fun, oh my gosh. And I think, hey guys, we will be right back to more of my interview with Terry Hamilton right after this quick message from another fantastic deluxe edition network podcast. This is take on the world with johnny and mike, and you know people always ask me hey, you got a podcast, what's it about? Uh, I don't know. You ever want to cut your fingers off or learn about a sharp knife? We could tell you that. How about murder mysteries or hauntings or any kind of fringe subject, anything you can think of? We take on everything because we take on the world. Now you go, take on the world.
Speaker 2:When I first started this podcast, I thought nobody is doing kindness. I don't see kindness around me on a daily basis. I see somebody that's gloating on Facebook about paying for somebody else's coffee or this and that occasionally not very often and I thought I just need to get the word out there about kindness and how it makes you feel and that can turn your life around, especially if you're feeling down in the dumps. And then I find out there are kindness groups and kindness people everywhere. I just had to look for them first.
Speaker 1:Yes, and it's your brain. Once it starts looking for it, it sees it right. It's that regular activating system in your brain and people are sending me all kinds of kindness quotes and kindness signs. And I got this beautiful plaque from a friend. That kindness is beautiful and I like, oh, it just is amazing.
Speaker 2:right, when you see it, you just keep seeing it there's a, there's a woman down in Florida that paints these signs and all it says is be kind. And it's got a heart and people will. If they happen to be going through Florida, they will pick one up from her. And these things are everywhere, terry. They're overseas, they're Asia, europe, everywhere, all over the United States. She actually sent one to one of my favorite groups up here, the Minnesota Kindness Alliance. She sent them one, so now they have one in their kindness, rock painting, space and it's just like wow, I know, is that amazing?
Speaker 1:that is beautiful. That's. Those are the ripple effects, right when you see, exactly doing that and sharing that, and then it just ripples, and often we don't even know how far it ripples. But I truly believe that we can make a huge difference in the world and that is my mission. It's like where I can spread kindness. I want to do more of that.
Speaker 2:Right for sure and talk to. Okay now the monthly kindness gatherings. Those are in association with the I Believe in Kindness page.
Speaker 1:They are.
Speaker 2:On the I.
Speaker 1:Believe in Kindness page you will see them posted. I gather the second Friday of each month in different locations. Thus far we've had luncheons at different locations and then during the summer months we're going to make them family friendly. So we're going to invite the children too and we're going to be making kindness rocks and putting them out for people to see and just brighten people's days and the more we do it, the happier we all are.
Speaker 2:We should do that in other locations. Yes, absolutely. That'd be fun. I might have to pick your brain after we're done with this you can pick, away, pick away. Have at it my brain. Um, silly stuff. But now and I I found you because of another person. No, I didn, I didn't. It just so happened that you are friends with somebody else who has been a guest on this show, and that gentleman's name is Steve Gamlin, the founder of Beach Bum. Philosophy, philanthropy it could be a philosophical thing, it definitely could be.
Speaker 1:It could be Philosophy thing.
Speaker 2:It definitely could be. It could be, yeah, philosophy, philanthropy, same thing. And how did you get involved with Steve?
Speaker 1:Well, steve and I actually have never met in person, but I was introduced to him through another friend and she's like you need to meet Steve Gamlin and I started following Steve. Steve started following me and I love the post that he puts out. He does um shopping cart rodeo. Have you seen any of his posts about? I have not. When he goes to a parking lot and he sees carts that are all over the place, he just takes it upon himself to gather them all up and bring them to the store.
Speaker 1:And I'm like how fun is that.
Speaker 2:I did. I just saw one. It might have been over the weekend, I think I reposted it to this podcast's page Just about. You know, there are a million different reasons that shopping cart could be out there in the middle of the parking lot. You know, maybe the woman had kids and couldn't handle a cart and the kids Maybe they were in the car. You know, maybe the person was disabled and instead of sitting there and griping about it, about this shopping cart, round it up. I love that shopping cart rodeo.
Speaker 1:Yes, and he bakes for the veterans. He does so many amazing things.
Speaker 2:For a homeless facility too, I believe.
Speaker 1:Yes, airbred, specifically, I will meet him in person. I will do that.
Speaker 2:You guys are very close geographically, are you not? Yes, we are I mean in relation to you and I. Yes, you're very close, so, oh, that's fun. So what is your favorite random act of kindness to do?
Speaker 1:Terry, I'm going to put you on the spot there I was going to say there are so many to pick from, but I think the one that popped into my head first was sending a card of appreciation. Sending a card to someone that you care about, someone that you love, someone that you don't know very well All of these words of appreciation make a difference. So when I gather people at my kindness gatherings, I give them blank cards and I ask them to just write to someone that they want to write to, and it could be a person in their home. They could put the card on their pillow, or it could be someone that they haven't talked to in a while.
Speaker 1:I have a beautiful story about a woman. She said right now, you want us to write the card. I'm like, yeah, right now I have stamps if you need them. And she wrote this card to a friend that she had not talked to in 10 years. And she wrote the card, she addressed it, we put a stamp on it and she asked me to mail it. She said because if I don't ask you to mail it, I might just keep it in my car.
Speaker 1:And I'm like you got it and she's like I don't know if I'll hear from her. I'm like you it, and she's like I don't know if I'll hear from her. I'm like you will hear from her. And sure enough, a week later she heard from her friend that she hadn't spoken to in 10 years. And they're having lunch this week and I'm like, wow, right wow and all it took.
Speaker 2:and you know both of them probably thought about each other over the years and all it took was her to have that bravery to write a note.
Speaker 1:To say I've been thinking right. I've been thinking of you. So when these cards of appreciation, affirmation, love, caring, kindness, when those go out into the world like people will hold on to those. So I think that is one of my very favorite acts of kindness.
Speaker 2:Absolutely. That's so fun. I know here in my area they do something. It's just at Christmas time, but I think it could be more often. Just like make a card or make a card. My wife is a cricketeer.
Speaker 1:I don't know if that's a word. She actually does make cards.
Speaker 2:She does make cards and she loves it All the things you can do with cricket and her absolute favorite is to make cards, and so they oftentimes solicit during the holidays for people to make Christmas cards for the seniors at a senior facility, which is so cool because I kind of have a soft spot in my heart for seniors.
Speaker 1:Me too.
Speaker 2:They went through hell during the pandemic. Quite honestly, I don't know, and I don't know that every state or locality was the same, but up here, like from the end of February until I don't know, when they were not allowed to have visitors.
Speaker 1:A very long time. That was heart-wrenching for me.
Speaker 2:Yeah, it was heart-wrenching.
Speaker 1:And I really am on a mission to have more cards sent out during the year, because I love that they come out during the holidays, right. But how about a summer holiday, right? How about we just say like, hi, how are you doing? And I think the senior population is a great place to start. I also think the veterans and the helpers, right Our police departments, our fire departments, all of the people that we count on to take good care of us, like letting them know that we appreciate them. How can we do that?
Speaker 2:Absolutely. That's a huge kindness right there. It's just letting somebody know that you see them and you appreciate the work that they do.
Speaker 1:Right and it doesn't take long to write a card. No, you can get it done in five minutes and the ripple effects are just profound.
Speaker 2:Yeah, and you can get a box. I can't get a box because I have no excuse to buy cards.
Speaker 1:You get beautiful cards from your wife. I've got all kinds of cards.
Speaker 2:I've got cards coming up, but you know you can get a box of thank you cards with nothing that are blank inside. Nobody does that anymore.
Speaker 1:I don't think that's a good stamp on.
Speaker 2:No, I was like eh, okay, anymore I don't think. No, I was like okay, I mean, yeah, it it takes five seconds, 10 seconds, 30 seconds, yeah, and and and. What an impact something like that makes you know to to the person that receives it. It's so kind and it's so nice and it's so heartfelt.
Speaker 1:Yeah, agreed, agreed. Yeah, you just put your heart on the card. I'm thinking of you, I appreciate you. I see you Like. Thank you yeah. It doesn't have to be any more complicated than that. No. Or anyone's talking to you right.
Speaker 2:And you can sign it or not sign it.
Speaker 1:That is very true it can be completely anonymous. That is very true.
Speaker 2:I think those are my favorite random acts of kindness, the ones that nobody knows where it came from.
Speaker 1:Yeah, we don't expect anything in return. When we're doing true acts of kindness, it's putting it out there and seeing. Sometimes, like I said, you don't see where the ripples go, but they go yeah and for me, I don't need to see.
Speaker 2:I know the ripples are going to go out anyway. Yes, because I know the power of kindness, so I don't need to see where they go. Oh my God, I smacked my microphone. Oh my, I wonder what that's going to sound like when I edit.
Speaker 1:Anyway, oh, my God.
Speaker 2:No, I don't need to see where they go. I know that they're going to go and I know they're going to, you know, an elderly person. They may have one of my cards sitting on there and maybe a nurse comes in, or maybe one of their family members comes in and goes hey, what's that? And it just keeps rippling.
Speaker 1:Absolutely.
Speaker 2:So oh it was so much fun to talk to you.
Speaker 1:Thank you, Mike. Can I ask you a question what's your favorite act of kindness?
Speaker 2:Anonymous, anything anonymous. And you know what? I've had my share of both. There was a woman in Walmart my wife and I were grocery shopping last spring and she had on this gorgeous and it was just the brightest yellow you've ever seen Terry dress. She may have just come from church, I don't know, but it caught my eye and I'm like wow. And then I thought that makes me happy. That dress is like if somebody said draw happiness, that dress was it. And I'm not a person that engages easily with other people. I mean podcasting. This is fantastic and I didn't start it until after the pandemic started. So I don't even know about having guests in the studio. Right, you know, in the room with you, but something said you need to tell her.
Speaker 2:And I went over and I said I'm sorry to bother you, but that dress is absolutely fantastic and it just makes me happy.
Speaker 2:And she went oh, and she broke out in this huge smile. So I love that, but I think I'm still partial to the. I don't need to see what the result is. I just love doing something that I know will make somebody happy and letting it out. Letting it go, putting it out in the world and I'm being very demonstrative today putting it out in the world and, just you know, letting the universe take care of it.
Speaker 1:I love that and I love that you have a kindness podcast, Mike. What a beautiful thing.
Speaker 2:Thank you. I this is. It has helped me mentally so much. I'm not going to do the story because my listeners are getting tired of hearing it, but I've been podcasting since December 2020. And when I started this podcast last year, I was not in a really great place, but this podcast makes me happy and you know it. If I can, if one person can hear that and go, oh yes, then I'm fulfilled. I don't need a patreon, I don't need any of this other stuff, and that probably goes back to the whole anonymous thing. Right? I don't know who listens to this podcast. I don't know who's heard a podcast episode and gone. That Terry Hamilton. She's amazing and I'm going to start my own kindness group because I listen to her. I don't need to know. I love that and I just have to believe that one person, at least one person hears an episode and goes yes that is the power of kindness.
Speaker 2:Mike, they're right there, the power boy, I am so uplifted and I am so energized. I don't know what I'm going to do with myself now. Terry, Mike, you have to go around and run around, and I don't know rope the moon. Thank you so much for sharing some of your time with me today. I really, really appreciate it.
Speaker 1:My absolute pleasure. Mike, Thank you for having me on. I could talk about kindness all day long.
Speaker 2:Now can I post in the I Believe in Kindness group that I talked to you.
Speaker 1:Absolutely.
Speaker 2:Awesome, because you showed me kindness by giving me of your time.
Speaker 1:My pleasure. Thank you for having me.
Speaker 2:All right, we will talk to you soon and take care and be well.
Speaker 1:You also?
Speaker 2:I absolutely love everything about Terry Hamilton. She is amazing. I love the work that she's doing with kids and parents and teachers and I absolutely love her Facebook group. I Believe in Kindness. If you have a chance, there'll be a link in the show notes. Go over, check it out on Facebook, join up and share some of the kind things that you've done or seen, and let's all try to make the world a better place, right?
Speaker 2:If you like the show and you like what we're about, please consider following us on any of the social media channels. We're on Facebook. We're on Instagram. We're on Facebook. We're on Instagram. We're on TikTok. We're on. We're on X heck yeah, we're even there. So check us out, follow us and we will have another quality show for you next week. Thank you so much for tuning in and listening. I really do appreciate it. I really appreciate you as well.
Speaker 2:I am going to be taking a little summer break for the next couple weeks, so I will be replaying a couple of episodes from the very beginning of the show. They have been my most listened to episodes, so hopefully, if you haven't caught up with all the episodes, you can check out these two, and that will do it for this episode of the Kindness Matters podcast. As I mentioned, we'll be back again next week with another show, but until then, be that person who roots for others, who tells a stranger they look amazing and encourages others to believe in themselves and their dreams. You've been listening to the Kindness Matters podcast. I'm your host, mike Rathbun. Have a fantastic week.
